Me: I'm sad. 3-year-old: Oh! I've got an idea! Scooter!! "I'm having a sword fight just like Mary Poppins!" **mashing his biggest metal truck against my butt** "It won't fit, Mama! It won't fit!"
Experiences
Rigging Up Your Baby Alarm
When our Kraken was a newborn grub, we bought one of those alarm systems that you stick on a baby, and if the goblin stops breathing (or the device falls off), a big loud alarm goes off, and... uh... I guess you know? Now that I think of it, I'm not sure what I would … Continue reading Rigging Up Your Baby Alarm
How To Halloween
It's the day after Halloween, so naturally now that it's no longer relevant I have all sorts of things to say on the topic! Maybe I should just schedule this to be posted in 11.5 months. Keep all your kid's fingers If the measure of a good parent is sending your spawn off to college … Continue reading How To Halloween
So You Want To Be A Parent
I have several people I love dearly who are considering taking the plunge into reproduction. Not a one of them has asked me for advice (I can't imagine why), but if they did, I'd ask them a few simple questions: Have you ever been in that relationship where you want to be together all. the. … Continue reading So You Want To Be A Parent
How To Entertain a Toddler in 109,843,821,093,249 Easy Steps
Try to get out of doing this. Seriously, can't you just play quietly in the corner? Or, I don't know, go lick a wall or something? I don't think there's any lead paint around here. I just want five minutes to drink my coffee in peace. So... that's a hard no then, huh? Pour coffee … Continue reading How To Entertain a Toddler in 109,843,821,093,249 Easy Steps
Bad Advice: A Waste Of Resources
There is literally no way your brain can comprehend how little sleep you get with a baby. Seriously, I went for the better part of a year only getting sleep in 2 hour chunks (max!), and even I can't comprehend surviving that. I heard once that after 24 hours of sleeplessness you start to enter … Continue reading Bad Advice: A Waste Of Resources
Glint of Light 