Oh man. Sometimes I have to think about what to write, but there are times when a subject so perfect, so marvelous, so deeply satisfying falls into my lap that no more thinking is required. Yes, that’s right, I will be writing the entirety of this post without the use of conscious thought.

What could make my heart go pitter-patter like this? What could possibly be so good that it provides fodder for not one, but several paragraphs effortlessly?

A vault full of rejected words.

Oh yes, you heard me right. The OED (Oxford English Dictionary for the non-English majors among us) keeps track of all the words people submit to them for entry into the dictionary that they ignore. In a vault. A VAULT! The article didn’t elaborate, but I can only come to two conclusions: 1) the reject-words are presumably being protected from linguistic thieves, or 2) the words must not be let out… at any cost.

I mean, need I say more?!

Hmmm… actually, I do need to say more. I need to list some of these beauties.

DICTIONARY OF NON WORDS

Asphinxiation – being sick to death of unanswerable puzzles or riddles
Dringle – the watermark left on wood caused by a glass of liquid.
Dunandunate – the overuse of a word or phrase that has recently been added to your own vocabulary
Furgle – to feel in a pocket or bag for a small object such as a coin or key
Lexpionage – the sleuthing of words and phrases
Nudenda – an unhidden agenda
Oninate – to overwhelm with post-dining breath
Optotoxical – a look that could kill, normally from a parent or spouse
Scrax – the waxy coating that is scratched off an instant lottery ticket
Sprog – to go faster then a jog but slower then a sprint
Wibble – the trembling of the lower lip just shy of actually crying
Xenolexica – a grave confusion when faced with unusual words

At this point if you’re not smiling I’m afraid I must say good day to you, sir. You clearly have no further business on this site.